Lots of Lemons with no Lemonade

Hey there,

Where have I been?  What’s this about lemons?  Lemons have such a sunny colour, yet the symbolism doesn’t match.  Life has not been kind of late.  How much detail to go into without bringing down the party here…and how much time do you have?  Buckle up!

With the busy-ness of all things early fall, and fall being my favourite season, I was remiss in parking myself down in front of my computer to write.  When given the choice between being inside and being outside on a glorious day, whenever possible, outside will always win, hands down!  We have had an unusually warm September/October season here in Southern Ontario.  Gardening has been fab, so that is what I did.  Good thing I did take advantage of that bliss… just sayin’.  My sky chart for the year did warn me that October was going to be “lively” and oh boy – never dismiss the woo woo. A mantra of mine.

Although, I must say, that I have missed sitting down to write.  Writing has become a form of therapy for me.  I’ve been told that I write like I speak…not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing…If you are reading this and you are a “regular”, thank you for your patience.  If you are new here, well, have a look back through my posts and you’ll see that I usually am a little more consistent – and yes, I’m weird. 🙂  I’ve always been a writer; the most easy communication for me.  Not so much for pleasure though.  I wrote as part of my job those many, many years in the corporate world.  But that was “corporatese”.  New word!  Not for fun, but I did it well.

Ok then, where to start?

Warning:  Tales of woe and litany ahead.

Here we go, lemons:

Early in October, my new little stray, Niles, went missing and was subsequently found a few days later.  We have lost Niles.  So sad.  He only lived here for about three months and I was getting quite attached.  He was a wild, fun little guy and there was no keeping him indoors.  Not sure where he came from – he just “appeared” one day with Ralph.  I’ve discussed that before.  I know many of you are going to think that cats should be kept indoors.  I am of the belief that when you live in the country, as I do, it is cruel to keep a cat in if they want to be out.  Nature is nature.  We can’t control everything.  Although I do make sure my kitties are in at night – many a time I’ve stayed up, waiting, waiting for the little so and so to show their face.  Did you ever read my post about Ralph?  No?  Probably one of my better ones, or so I’ve been told!  Go ahead and have a read, I’ll wait.

So, that was Niles – a cool name for a cool guy.  A pity we didn’t get the chance to know him better.

Next, more lemons:

Winnie got very sick and within a couple of days, she passed.  Winnie was my pretty, attitude-filled, mean-girl kitty.  But she was so sweet – and a healthy girl all her life.  So when she got sick, she knew her time was coming.  While she was still strong enough, I watched her outside, visiting the places she loved, saying her good byes and telling me, there wasn’t long.  She was 19 and this had been her only home.  So, a good life and I stayed by her side while she ailed.

Winnie gave me so much.  I do miss her terribly.  The spot where her bed was by the fire is empty, but she is with me in spirit.  She now lives in the Cedars and the wind.

I am down to only one cat.  Ralph.  This is unheard of under the blue roof.  I have never only had one cat, and Ralph is quite lonely.  He has become my constant companion.  I am thinking about bringing home a rescue kitty, but one would have to be chosen carefully for Ralph.  He is Alpha, he is about 13 – although still lots of pep in his step (you know my kitties tend to have very long lives!) – and he likes to stir things up.  He’s got a mischievous streak and a glint in his eyes.  Ralph was a stray and he’s lived here about 10 years.  He loves to be outside, but it’s getting easier to get him in, as he likes his creature comforts now as the weather cools and he’s no kitten anymore…

Perhaps a kitten – I haven’t had a really young kitten here under the blue roof since Winnie was a kitten!  They are such fun – I’m such a sucker for kittens…one (or two) would certainly give Ralph a run.

Oh boy,

My gut is telling me to wait.  Even though Ralph is lonely.  I think I’m going to see what the Winter brings – or who the Winter brings.  Maybe see who finds me.  That’s usually the way things roll around here.

So I lost Niles, then Winnie.  On to the human issues that have been my October.

More lemons:

Thanksgiving weekend.  Thanksgiving was very early here in Canada – leaving lots of room in October for the proverbial poo to hit the fan.

Aren’t you glad you stopped in?

I, of course, am cooking Thanksgiving dinner, as I do the family gathering for every occasion.  Not that I’m bitter about that – kittens and flowers, kittens and flowers – although bitter goes with the topic of lemons, we won’t go there today.  That, dear readers, could be a topic all on its own.

Lemons:

I’ve just lost my Winnie, and seriously not feeling the fam dinner thing, but circumstances being what they are…UGH…I’m cooking a turkey.  Dinner happens, minus one.

I will not go into a lot of detail here, because it involves another family member (who isn’t a reader, so really, all bets could be off).  You know, I don’t think any of my family are readers, save my lovely Daughter.  And she won’t tell…RIGHT?!

Anyhoo…lemons…

This family member is rushed to hospital the next day for emergency surgery.  No details.  Suffice it to say, it is very serious.

Now, as if the lemons aren’t bad enough in this scenario, this family member that is in hospital lives with, and is also the sole caregiver to a 95 year old Aunt (it’s not just the cats that have long lives in this family…).  She still lives in her house. Not anywhere near the blue roof, of course.  No, this is all taking place in the City.

They call me mellow, yellow…

So, we’ve got the family member in ICU, in the City – the City being west Toronto – and we’ve got the 95 year old Aunt, not able to be on her own.

LEMONS:

The following week is spent back and forth every day to the City – hospital and Aunt’s house, scrambling with doctors and medical people in one place and trying to put in place temporary arrangements for the Aunt, who is still very sharp in her mind, but physically, not great – and she is fighting everything suggested…

LEMONS:

Exhausted much?  Geez, I know I’m a double Virgo – Leo cusp Virgo Sun and Virgo Moon – and a life-long caregiver in some form or another – it’s what I do – but I’m getting @%&#! tired.

LEMONS:

Family member is still in hospital.  Aunt currently in temporary respite, but not wanting to stay.  Trying to figure out a solution, if there is one. Back and forth, back and forth.

LEMONS:

You know, I think, that my parents are both in caregiving facilities and I run after their every need.  Manage every aspect of their lives.  I am in year 5 of all things them.  Yes, I said 5.  Still get the question, “So, do you work?” Ummm

The current crisis peeps are on “the other side” of the fam.  Much stress.

#herewegoagain
#novacationinsight

Easy to say:  Not my circus, not my monkeys…but, nope, I’m in.

I’m thinking that I must have had one helluva good time in my last life – or at least one of my past lives.  I’m thinking I’ve been around a few times.  Excuse me while I close my eyes for a moment and try to conjure that up.

Those lemons?  I’m going to need some vodka to go with that lemonade, if they ever turn to that.

Hmmm, not much mention about plants this time around.  Well, lemons grow on trees, right?  I actually consume a lot of lemon – not metaphorically speaking this time.  Lemons are awesome for balancing your ph levels.  I’ve always got some in my glass of water.  A good natural cleaner and deodorizer too – and they smell divine!

There’s a little positive for ya.  You’re welcome – thanks for stopping in!

So there you have it, you’re up-to-date on my tale of woe and litany (please).

If it looks like I’m winking at you, I’m not…I need glasses to work on the computer now and haven’t gotten around to getting them yet, because, well, SEE ABOVE.

October is almost at it’s end.  Samhain (Hallowe’en) on Tuesday – and I haven’t dug out my pointy hat yet. 🙂  October’s flower is Calendula – my favourite – and showing her sunny self in part of my garden in the photo above.  We’ve had a frost, but she is still blooming and I can see her from The Meadowview.

As I write this afternoon, the Moon is in Aquarius but she moves into Pisces in her second quarter for this evening’s show.  A little Pisces would be good right now – intuitive and gentle.

Today’s colour for Sun-day is gold!

So, what’s new with you?

Phew! I’m going to see about making some lemonade.  It’s gotta be 5 o’clock somewhere…

Until next time,

-Debra